A Shadowy Love Story

 

They say people come into our lives for a reason.  Well, sometimes that's true for animals as well.  Shadow taught me about the love that comes through persevering through difficulties.  I have never connected with any animal they way I connect with Shadow.  To me he's not a pet - he's my family.

I first met Shadow nine years ago when my friend rescued him from the side of the road.  Young people were throwing things at him and she took pity on him because he looked so cute.  She put him under her jumper and took him home.  He was happy there.  He loved his new owner and had a nice yard to play with.  So he wasn't very impressed when she gave him to me.

The first few months with Shadow were awful.  He howled non stop, scratched non stop, put toilet paper all over the house and broke several of my picture frames.  Some people told me to have him put down.  Others that I obviously wasn't good with aggressive males cats.  But I decided to love him through it.

The change happened gradually.  The first thing was that he let me pat him.  After a while he learned to trust me.  Soon there were no more broken frames or toilet paper.  And the howling was replaced by purring.  He had settled down.

Shadow is an incredibly beautiful looking cat.  He is a long-haired black and white cat with big, soulful, green eyes.  The markings on his face are symmetrical and his coat is fluffy and shiny.  I always tell him how beautiful he is.  And I even sing to him.

Shadow and I understand each other because we both have mental illnesses.  And no I'm not joking.  Shadow is on medication for his anxiety and mood swings.  And it works both ways.  Shadow is such a comfort to me when I'm unwell.  His cat cuddles are so healing.  And he loves me because I first loved him.  I don't have to prove anything to him.

Likewise when Shadow is stressed or angry I put him in my bedroom for 'time out' which is more effective than punishing him.  If I'm aggressive he ups the ante.  But if I put him in my bedroom he's soon calm again.

The last few years have been very difficult for Shadow and I.  Shadow has developed a severe urinary tract inflammation.  A few times he became completely blocked up and nearly died.  I felt the stress of losing him in my chest and my stomach.  Sudden stabbing pains in both areas and difficulty breathing.

Shadow hates the vet.  He growls and howls and won't take his medication.  I can only imagine how difficult it must have been for him.  The vets, fortunately, were very calm and supportive and let me pay off some of his vet fees.  

The expense of vet bills, medication and special food has been difficult to deal with but I have had a lot of help and support from family and friends.  

The thought of losing Shadow terrified me at the time but now I have come to terms with it.  No one lasts forever (on this earth anyway).  So I'm grateful for every day that I have with him.

At the last vet appointment they found a mass in his tummy.  He looked scrawny and sick.  I thought he would die very soon but he didn't.  It's been months.  In fact the opposite happened.  He put on a bit of weight and his fur became glossy again.  

The last few years have been difficult for me too.  I have many physical and mental illnesses and many have played up.  A few weeks ago I had a colonoscopy.  I have also had some problems with asthma, diabetes and high blood pressure.  Sometimes I have been scared that I might be the one who dies.

When I feel like that Shadow is a great comfort to me.  It's just so good to be loved.  And, like difficult humans, Shadow shows much more loyalty than a more easy going cat would.  He loves with passion.

It really has been a Shadowy love story